Welcome to The Loud Introvert, previously spiralboundthoughts! Why the change? If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it, right? It wasn’t broke, per se, but it was admittedly a little directionless. I’ve been blogging for several years about random things all over the board and so often I’m met with comments from family and friends along the lines of, “when are you going to write a book?” Truth be told, I’ve been working on that book for a while. I’m about halfway through the first draft and I realized that aside from the aforementioned friends and family, I have no idea who would read my directionless rambling. I need to further examine myself, my story, what I want to get out of writing, and where I think it’s going.
My story is crazy. My story is full of “you’ve got to be kidding me”s, both funny and heartwrenching. In the hand of cards I’ve been dealt, I hoped so desperately for a full house, and I didn’t even have a single pair. But I’m still playing round after round, and amidst devastation and disappointment and wild rides and hilarity, God gave me a voice to speak and has been nudging my heart towards the microphone. I want to share my story with you, in all of its bits and pieces. There are some things I will lay bare right here, and some I will cradle closer to my chest until we maybe sit down for an intimate cup of tea one day. But I’m here, and I would love for you to join me.
So why the name change? Spiralboundthoughts was a cozy and comfortable choice I made because it reminded me of coiled notebooks full of scribbles and notes and doodles. It was perfect for my random thoughts. But it didn’t seem to fit where I wanted to go as I looked at a new horizon. I needed to represent myself more boldly, giving a proper portrayal of the contradictory and multifaceted person being constantly shaped behind the scenes.
Ever seen me at a party or social function? I’m loud. I’m the centre of attention. I have a blast. I’ll take off my shoes and dance and belt along with the music and crack joke after joke after joke. I’m way out there. What people don’t see is that after I’ve had an amazing time and enjoyed myself to the moon and back, I go home and crawl into bed and hope I never have to see people again for the rest of my life. Overdramatic? Maybe. But that’s just who I am. I love having a great time and being a little wild, but at the end of it all, I need to recharge and rejuvenate by myself until my soul batteries aren’t so depleted. People are shocked to learn that I’m an introvert, because of my party personality. I’m no wallflower, I’ll engage in heated social discussions, I have a passionate opinion about virtually everything under the sun. But that means nothing if I can’t have my alone time fairly often. A hundred social encounters are sometimes fun, but ultimately exhausting for me if I can’t find a vulnerable and deep connection.
That’s the reason behind the name change! I’m going to share loud and bold thoughts and stories from behind the quiet distance of a website. One day soon, I want to share those loud and bold thoughts and stories through the pages of a book. Within me is a deep longing and need to speak, and also to be heard and to have my soul seen. To skip the small talk, go beyond the shallow and surface-level and be vulnerable. Come on in, take off your shoes, and curl up with me. Let’s really get to know each other.